GoZips Posted September 10, 2013 Report Share Posted September 10, 2013 University of Michigan Coach Brady Hoke is only going to dress half of his players for the game this week; the other half will have to dress themselves How is the Akron football team like an opossum? They play dead at home and get killed on the road. Why did the Kant State linebacker steal a police car? He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche. How do you get a former Northern Illinois football player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza. What are the longest three years of a University of Buffalo football players life? Freshman I, Freshman II, and Freshman III. What do you get when you put 32 West Virginia cheerleaders in one room? A full set of teeth. If three Toledo football players are in the same car, who is driving? The police officer. Ohio State's Urban Meyer on one of his players: "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades and he doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words." Why do Bowling Green fans wear orange? So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up trash on Monday. What does the average Alabama player get on his SATs? Drool...!!! How did the UMass football player die from drinking milk? The cow fell on him. Two Western Michigan football players were walking in the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird." The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" A University of Miami football player was almost killed yesterday in a tragic horseback-riding accident. He fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death. Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse. What do you say to a Kant State football player dressed in a three-piece suit? " "Will the defendant please rise." How many Michigan freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb? None. That's a sophomore course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ziptrumpet87 Posted September 10, 2013 Report Share Posted September 10, 2013 Why did the Kant State linebacker steal a police car? He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche. Most excellent! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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