Butt Monkeys

[GP1]

We all know who they are, so I won't call them out unless you all would like me to call them out. They are the Butt Monkeys that post on this board all the time about the direction of the program. Common personality traits of the Butt Monkey include, but are not limited to, over reactions to normal events and an unending desire to be right even if it means the team loses. The breeding call sounds something like this (I know Butt is spelled wrong):1. I hate to say this, butt I don't think this program is going in the right direction.2. I hate to say this, butt the talent level on this team is not nearly what it was in 2003.3. I hate to say this, butt we can not win with all of our players flunking out of school.4. I hate to say this, butt JD does not seem to be able to win big games.*5. I hate to say this, butt the talent level around the MAC is much better than ours.6. I hate to say this, butt our coaching staff has no idea how to make halftime adjustments.**7. I hate to say this, butt our recruits are not developing the way they should.8. I hate to say this, butt I think JD has lost control of this team.* This rare breed of Butt Monkey was rendered temporarily blind on 12-1-2005 and has no recollection of that day.** The favorite food of this Butt Monkey is a banana; however, it has never seen a banana and would not know what one was if it fell out of a tree and hit the Butt Monkey on the head.

[Captain Kangaroo]

All pretty legit points.We beat K.e.n.t. with:* A Soph QB in his first start* A Center in his first start...and an OL where Kemme was the only player with any experience* A WR corp that had lost 2 of our top 3 players from '06Our offense is SO unbelieveably young. Yet we put up 27 points against the MAC East's *allegedly* #1 defense. No Nate Robinson on D...and he had a tremendous start to the season. (he'll play at UConn, BTW). No John Mackey.We basically went into the game and beat K.e.n.t. with one hand tied behind our back! This was a game where Brookhart shines over Lee Owens. No way in hell an Owens' led defense makes that stop at game's end. Our offense is a sometimes-ugly work-in-process...but the defense is steller, and that should win us a lot of ball games this fall. BTW : UConn WAXED Pitt in Pittsburgh last night. I turned it off when they were up by about 30 pts. Our offense is going to need to play like they did in the 2nd half vs. K.e.n.t. if we're going to have a shot.BTW2: CMU got blown out by a 1-AA team on their home fieldBTW3: Miami got blown out 42-0 at Colorado...after losing by 37 at home vs. Cincinnati

[ZZZips]

Another favorite for the BUtt Monkeys is the attendance argument going one in another thread. I know the facts bother the Butt Monkeys. Here are the MAC home team attendance figures from yesterday, listed smallest to largest crowds.10,141 Eastern Michigan15,219 Toledo15,718 Western Michigan16,482 Bowling Green16,522 Central Michigan16,781 Ohio21,867 Akron22,676 Buffalo

[GP1]

BTW : UConn WAXED Pitt in Pittsburgh last night. I turned it off when they were up by about 30 pts. Our offense is going to need to play like they did in the 2nd half vs. K.e.n.t. if we're going to have a shot.

We are talking about a Dave Wanstead coached team. An anoymous NFL coach was once quoted as saying, "Dave Wanstead will turn Pitt into Temple within five years." Looks like it may be true.We just need to keep taking care of business in the MAC, the MAC East especially and everything will be fine.Can't is a 6-6 team. It may make them special for the Can't, but not for college football.

[GP1]

Another favorite for the BUtt Monkeys is the attendance argument going one in another thread. I know the facts bother the Butt Monkeys. Here are the MAC home team attendance figures from yesterday, listed smallest to largest crowds.10,141 Eastern Michigan15,219 Toledo15,718 Western Michigan16,482 Bowling Green16,522 Central Michigan16,781 Ohio21,867 Akron22,676 Buffalo

A Butt Monkey will never allow the facts to get in the way of a stupid argument.

[GP1]

Another favorite for the BUtt Monkeys is the attendance argument going one in another thread.

Did you mean Butt Monkey or Buck Monkey? Either way, there are so many similarities in the genetic make-up of these two breeds of monkey, the difference can not be calculated easily.Sure is fun beating Can't.

[ZachTheZip]

Yesterday saw the biggest home attendance for UA since the Marshall game. That's not bad at all if you ask me.

[RowdyZip]

Random thought...anyone else see the girl in the buckeyes jersey? i think she was catching some smack and was wearing a "fear the roo" shirt later in the morning. I'm pretty sure it wasnt her own because it was one of those free ones from campus and appeared to be a xxl.

[Buckzip]

Another favorite for the BUtt Monkeys is the attendance argument going one in another thread.

Did you mean Butt Monkey or Buck Monkey? Either way, there are so many similarities in the genetic make-up of these two breeds of monkey, the difference can not be calculated easily.Sure is fun beating Can't.

I hope you aren't talking about me GP1. Although I know you are.I have over 1000 posts on a board where most posters don't like me, yet I am a butt/buck monkey. Less than 5% of my posts are critical of anything UA. Yet, you seem to forget the other 95%. Well, whatever. You will see what you want to see.I guess we need to be 100% positive 100% of the time. I wish life worked like that.That last thread, if you knew how to read, said the MAC is the issue, not UA.However, in the typical let's bash the guy that isn't a 100% homer mentality, you took that as a bash against UA. Your post completely proves my point. People are saying we had the second highest attendance for the day. That is great. However, that attendance included crowds from 2 schools that are less than 1/2 hour apart that are rivals. Again, this isn't a bash Akron issue, it is a bash the MAC issue.My comment was the MAC. Not UA. You think that it is great that with 21,000 fans, that was the second highest. I am glad there were that many people there. I just thought there would be even more.Buffalo, with about 23,000 fans was the highest. You really think that says anything good about our conference?I am really done with this now. Some of you guys are so full of hate you can't understand what being objective is all about.Yesterday was a great win for the UA program. This is a young team that has a great future. However. my point is that UA will never truly become a top tier team until they leave the MAC. I really look forward to that day.

[bobbyake]

again, it's not a problem with MAC supporters, it's a problem with the non-MAC supporters.

[Buckzip]

again, it's not a problem with MAC supporters, it's a problem with the non-MAC supporters.

I will only reply to this post since it is you Bobby.I 100% AGREE WITH YOU. That is my point.My point was about the MAC.........................................

[bobbyake]

then don't blame MAC supporters. Blame the ones that think the MAC is a minor league conference compared to you know what.Examples:PDBeacon JournalChannel 5 NewsChannel 19 NewsChannel 9 News3/4 Akron9/10 Cleveland9/10 Can't

[Zipgrad01]

Why blame the MAC supporters or non-MAC supporters? Blame the teams!! Until MAC teams starting being extremely competitive against quality out of conference teams on a consistent basis everyone will think they are a minor league conference and rightfully so. You have to win games against good teams to earn peoples respect. You can't just play the "I am 1-A too" card. Now, for the butt monkey comments.......what? I don't know anyone that is critical of all those things. If so, name them. It surely isn't me and I am sure I was one of the intended targets. I am critical of 2 or 3 , but not all. If you can honestly look at the list you wrote and think that every one of those issue is fine, then you sir need to stop drinking the kool aid and realize Akron will always be a .500 football team if you are satisfied.I sat in the stands yesterday and there were a lot of unhappy people sitting around me. Granted, everyone is happy Akron won, but they aren't 100% sold on the team or the direction of the program. I heard quite a few "this is just sloppy football. That coach needs to go and they need to get better players. Luckily Can't doesn't have anything either." Some more examples of things I heard from MULTIPLE people......1. Carlton Jackson can't throw the ball and a lot of people were yelling to get him out of the game. Then they realized the back up option was no better. While I don't 100% agree with that assessment it is partly true. In my opinion, CJ holds the ball way too long. He is a run first qb more than he should be. He tries to put touch on too many balls and that makes him extremely inaccurate. I just think he is a really young guy and he will get better. However, the coaches need to work with him on putting a little more zip on the ball. He missed a lot of open guys and had a few balls nearly picked because they floated in the air forever.2. The team is EXTREMELY undisciplined. There were way too many false starts, personal fouls, missed tackles and dropped passes. These are all signs of poor coaching and lack of leadership.3. The play calling is terrible most of the time. Everything we run is sideways. We complained the entire first half because we never ran the ball between the tackles and that was allowing the defense to stifle our "sideways" offensive attack. Guess what happened in the 2nd half? JD made an adjustment and we finally started running a little between the tackles and we had some success. It brought the safeties inside and now all the sudden the outside opened up. Imagine that?4. Special teams was sub par. The punting game was terrible on both sides.You guys can say what you want, but I brought 4 people to the game with me. 2 of them had never been to an Akron game before. About 2 quarters in one of them looked at me and said "I thought you said this was division 1 football? Our high school punter is way better than this guy." I just shrugged my shoulders because I really had nothing to say. It was a sloppy, sloppy game.I think many things about the program are heading in the right direction. I think the talent level is improving. I think the facilities are improving, etc.. However, to say that everything is peachy would be foolish.

[Zippysgotagun]

then don't blame MAC supporters. Blame the ones that think the MAC is a minor league conference compared to you know what.Examples:PDBeacon JournalChannel 5 NewsChannel 19 NewsChannel 9 News3/4 Akron9/10 Cleveland9/10 Can't

While I agree that your point is unfortunate, the MAC really has given little evidence to the contrary.1. K.e.n.t. Beat Big 12 Iowa state2. BG (barely) beat Minnesota3. Ball State came really close against NebraskaIncluding those games, the MAC's OOC Schedule looks something like thisvs. Big Ten 1-10Vs. Big 12 2-5 (both wins over ISU)Vs. Big East 0-4Vs. SEC 0-1 (Kentucky just about tripled K.S.Ucks)How can we claim our conference gets no respect when this is what we look like in the standings?The only solution to the problem is to move to a bigger conference, take your lumps and build a program. I think JD is doing a fine job here, but he's constantly limited by the fact that we play in a bottom-feeding conference. Move to the Big East, then work your way up there. When you're stuck in the MAC, you can't be expected to do anything except win the Motor City Bowl. Mark my words, a MAC team won't ever pull a Boise State. We need to exit the conference and move up.

[GP1]

I hope you aren't talking about me GP1. Although I know you are.

You're a genius.

[zipsbandman]

Okay so we won the game, but I guarantee that if the Can't receiver makes the catch at the end of the game and we lose, we would be calling for JD's head. The first half of the game was miserable. I think the beach ball did more to keep the crowd in the game than our team. There are things that bother me about this program and a major major one is player retention. What if Harvey was playing in that game? We had walk ons playing.....not all guys we originally had on scholarship. I really do not think we will win the east. Can't played just as sloppy as we did, and that is why we won.

[74ZIP]

GP1...relax a little...few of us who frequent this site want to see the ZIPS lose...EVER! BUTT(AR...AR) some of us may be a bit more subdued in our pre-season and pre-game expectations lets say...i know you were at the game yesterday...if so you would have seen me and others, i assume yelling ourselves hoarse...thing is some of the points you posted abou the what the BUTT MONKEYS were saying were true...JD admitted he needed to regain some control...thats why some kids were shown the door...and nobody really knows how this team will play against UCONN(ouch) Western Mich, OU etc. etc...in any event any win over can't HELPS make a season...BUTT they still have a LOT of work to do...

[RACER]

this was a good win by the zips.great defense,and kicking game.when will jd address the penalties.we were the most penalized team last year.there is no reason for the personal fouls.the last one gave Can't a chance to win the game.if a guy gets a pesonal foul sit him.nothing gets the attention of a player than riding the pine.i also like rotating the rb's.it keeps a fresh rb,and i think it showed in the fourth qtr.i don't think Can't gets all those rushing yards if mackey,and robinson were in the game.

[ZippyAlum]

Hey zipsbandman, what's wrong with walk ons? I'm not sure who you're talking about (I know of no walk ons who played) but I'd sure sooner play with guys who have heart and do what it takes to be a productive part of the team than prima donas who think the university owes them a free education and that they have no responsibility to at least go to class. Walk ons have to do everything the scholarship players do plus pay for their own education. For the most part they're tackling dummies who will never see the field. If by some turn of fate they make the field they should certainly be applauded. Scholarship players get a great pay off. They get their education free. Walk ons play football for the love of the game.

[Captain Kangaroo]

I hope you aren't talking about me GP1. Although I know you are.

You're a genius.

And someone had complained there was no humor on this board?

[Z.I.P.]

BTW : UConn WAXED Pitt in Pittsburgh last night. I turned it off when they were up by about 30 pts. Our offense is going to need to play like they did in the 2nd half vs. K.e.n.t. if we're going to have a shot.

We are talking about a Dave Wanstead coached team. An anoymous NFL coach was once quoted as saying, "Dave Wanstead will turn Pitt into Temple within five years." Looks like it may be true.We just need to keep taking care of business in the MAC, the MAC East especially and everything will be fine.Can't is a 6-6 team. It may make them special for the Can't, but not for college football.

GP1,An anonymous Miami Dolphin DE told me virtually the same thing, so don't think you have any kind of scoop here.

[zipsdad]

Obviously the punter has still not proven to the idiots out there that know nothing about the position that he is better than average....he saved us a safety when the protection broke down right in front of him and actually shed the tackler to get to the sideline to get off the rugby kick (which by the way he doesn't call) for 49 yards....tell me how many return yards they got....10 maybe...everything was max hang time and no blocks....the kid is only in his second year and showed the upside at OSU...give him a break...as I've said before there's a reason Hildreth is not playing....

[skip-zip]

I really hate to keep repeating this, but to those of you who think that we need to switch conferences, please understand that no conference that is larger than the MAC is going to have any interest in Akron as long as most of our home games show about 5,000 people in the stands. The bigger conferences want money. And we can't show them that we can generate revenue. It's as simple as that.