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Why Dan Hipsher Should Keep His Job


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I think Dan Hipsher should keep his job because:

#10. His players play H-A-R-D for him. Never an ounce of quit.

#9. Stellar player retention...hardly ever see a kid drop out! *cough*

#8. Stellar academic record...*cough Sims*, *cough E Smith*, *cough Courtney Jones* *cough Preston*, *cough etc*

#7. The way his team responds after time-outs...never a turnover or a bad shot!

#6. Who else could get 38 minutes per game out of a guy with the mobility of Frankenstein?

#5. 20 win seasons are overrated!

#4. MAC Tourney wins are overrated!

#3. Playing in a 30% full JAR provides an intimate setting for you and your date.

#2. If he gets fired...we could lose Bryan Hipsher to Can't (transfer)!!

And the #1 reason Dan Hipsher should keep his job...*drum roll*.....

F-bombs, F-bombs, F-bombs! :o

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Seriously...is there any possible reason why he should be coach in 2004-5?

Overall record: Horrible

Tourney record: Horrible

Player retention: Bad

Major Out of Conference Wins: None

Tenure: 9 years

Excessive Cost to Terminate?: Nope. Either use the money saved when Owens quit towards a buyout, or "reassign" the guy and hope he follows Owens lead.

It is impossible to be truely successful in NE Ohio Hoops with a 6,000 seat arena: Can't State has 6 consecutive 20 win seasons.

It is impossible to win at Akron: Bob Huggins had 4, 20-win seasons in 5 years.

Next year's team will be "loaded," so he shouldn't be release now: Gee...how many times have we heard that?

Can anyone give me a reason why he should stay? Just one? Why do I have to go home with some moral victory (yay, Dru Joyce got 23 points...but we lost again) and an excuse every week (gosh, we learned about the suspensions after practice the day before the game ), while Can't is drubbing teams in front of a packed house on ESPN2 every week?

:angry:

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